Nana lives two hundred miles away, or two thousand. She sees Grace at Christmas and in the summer holidays, and in between she’s a face on a screen that freezes at the best bit. Distance is hard on grandparents, and it can leave them feeling like visitors in their grandchildren’s lives. Bedtime is one of the gentlest ways to change that.
Little and often beats long and rare
A long video call once a month is lovely, but it’s the small, regular things that keep someone present in a child’s life. A goodnight message every Tuesday. A postcard on the fridge. The same question at the end of each call: “What shall we tell Nana next time?”
Children build their sense of who is close through repetition. Someone who turns up in a small way every week can feel nearer than someone who turns up in a big way twice a year. So rather than saving everything for the visits, look for small, easy ways to keep Grandma in the week.
It helps grandparents too. Many say the hardest part of living far away is feeling that they’ve missed things: the new word, the wobbly tooth, the drawing that only lasted a day on the fridge. A small weekly ritual gives them a reason to be in touch that doesn’t depend on big news, and a place in the week that’s theirs.
Calls that suit bedtime, not just the clock
Video calls right at bedtime can wind children up. There’s the excitement of seeing Grandma, the bright screen, and the sudden urge to show her every toy they own. By the time you say goodbye, nobody is sleepy.
It often works better to call a little earlier, after tea or before the bath, and keep it short. Give your child one thing to show or tell, so the call has a shape. If the time difference makes evenings impossible, a weekend morning call can carry the same warmth.
One idea many families love: post Grandma a second copy of a favourite picture book. Then she can read it on the call while your child follows along in their own copy, turning the pages together across the miles.
Let her voice arrive right on time
The one thing a video call can’t do is wait. It happens when both of you are free, which may not be when your child is tucked up and ready for a story. A recording doesn’t have that problem. Grandma can record whenever suits her, and it plays at the usual time, in the usual place, at the end of the usual routine.
It can be as simple as a voice note on your phone: Grandma reading a short book, or just saying goodnight and telling your child she’s thinking of them. Played at bedtime, it brings her into the room in a way that feels natural rather than staged. Grandparents often find this easier than a live call, too. There’s no pressure, and they can have another go if they lose their place.
A few small things make a recording easier to love. A quiet room, with the television off. The phone held steady, not too close. Her normal pace, a little slower than chat. And, if she likes, the same goodnight line she’d use in person, so it sounds like her rather than like a reading.
Keep her in the room between calls
Some of the best ways to keep Grandma close don’t need a screen at all. A photo of her by the bed. A soft toy she sent, which sleeps there every night. A blanket she knitted, or one that smells a little like her house. Small, physical things carry a lot of feeling for a child.
Talk about her at bedtime, too. Read her letters aloud. Tell your child that Nana can see the same moon tonight, even if, on the other side of the world, she’s looking at it at breakfast time. Children love the idea of a shared sky, and it makes a faraway person feel part of the same world.
Grandparents can’t always be there for bath time, but they can still be part of how the day ends. And for a child, knowing that Nana is thinking of them at bedtime, wherever she is, is a quiet kind of comfort that lasts.
Sweet dreams,The BellaBye teamWritten byThe BellaBye teamWe’re a family making bedtime stories for every child, read in the voices they love.
